Neglect various
children around a public space. The children should be noisy – let
them drop things loudly and vocalise – and the parents should
ignore them until the children make an unbearable noise. Unpredictable piercing screams are best.
Occasionally the parents should utter the sound ssshhh and look delighted.
The more the children scream, the more delighted the parents should
be, verging on worship.
As people object, they
should retort “These are children! All children make a noise.”
If anyone disagrees, the
parents should become aggressive and ask “Are you saying I don't
raise my children properly?”
Just as it might seem
that someone will become violent, a dog should start barking.
Now enter the lead
vocalist, who says, without being invited “It's all right, I
certainly don't mind”
The dog should be
encouraged to howl, perhaps by being kicked by a child who should be
made to scream piercingly perhaps by being threatened by the dog
All smile and say how
nice it is
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