I stumbled on a website called grammerly. It is software to make writing betterer; so I gave it an 8 line poem I added to my work in progress this morning.

It found that my writing is original, but also found 13 critical issues, whatever that means, 5 concerning my sentence structure, which need correcting; and found that in one case I had chosen the wrong word. Score 41 out of a hundred – weak, needs revision. It offered me a free trial. I didn't know bad grammar was illegal. Vacuum help us all.

So I gave it my latest essay, about 5000 words, which the editor who accepted it for book publication called truly wonderful. Ha! What did he know. I have 28 critical writing issues

Grammarly detected unoriginal text. That's probably one of the quotations. It detected a spelling error. That's probably because I am writing in English.

I have 1 issue with adjectives and adverbs, says the software called grammarly; and 1 issue with faulty parallelelism (!) and 1 issue with a confusing modifier. That it thinks adds up to 11

I thought 1 + 1 + 1 = 3; so my arithmetic may be faulty as well.

I have 5 issues with punctuation within a sentence. My other punctuation must be ok.

I have 7 issues with writing style and 3 with vocabulary

It wants to change 48 words where I have made a bad choice in its opinion.

I scored 49 out of 100 although this report is far more damning than the first one.

This is software in the spirit of the electorate: views of things it has no interest in understanding and a faith in technology that is more touched than touching.